Parents are pathetic

Taking a deep drag on his cigarette while resting on the steering wheel of his truck, he looks like a parody of a middle-aged lorry driver.

But the image covers up a much more disturbing truth: At just the tender age of two, Ardi Rizal’s health has been so ruined by his 40-a-day habit that he now struggles to move by himself…

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1281538/Smoking-year-old-Ardi-Rizal-40-cigarettes-day.html#ixzz0pIUWpfWJ

(Spotter: Klatrymadon)

Selective breeding

Donna Simpson already weighs 43st, but she is determined to nearly double her size to become the world’s fattest woman.

The 42-year-old from New Jersey, U.S, is set on reaching the 1,000lb mark (71st) in just two years. Remarkably she insists she is healthy, despite now needing a mobility scooter when she goes shopping…

Attraction outlawed

Fourteen male students from a University of Oxford college have been suspended over allegations about the sending of sexist e-mails.

It is believed the e-mails sent at Hertford College contained a secret list grading female students…

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/oxfordshire/8553365.stm

Papers, please

The first person jailed under draconian UK police powers that Ministers said were vital to battle terrorism and serious crime has been identified by The Register as a schizophrenic science hobbyist with no previous criminal record.

His crime was a persistent refusal to give counter-terrorism police the keys to decrypt his computer files.

The 33-year-old man, originally from London, is currently held at a secure mental health unit after being sectioned while serving his sentence at Winchester Prison…

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/11/24/ripa_jfl/

Asking for it

Five men have been cleared of raping a woman after it emerged she had spoken online about group sex fantasies.

The 24-year-old from Liverpool claimed she was raped after visiting one of the men at his home in Bolton, after making contact on the internet.

But the trial at Preston Crown Court collapsed when computer evidence was produced showing her entertaining the prospect of group sex.

Judge Robert Brown ordered the jury to return not guilty verdicts…

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/manchester/8455161.stm

We are idiots

COLORADO SPRINGS — This tax-averse city is about to learn what it looks and feels like when budget cuts slash services most Americans consider part of the urban fabric.

More than a third of the streetlights in Colorado Springs will go dark Monday. The police helicopters are for sale on the Internet. The city is dumping firefighting jobs, a vice team, burglary investigators, beat cops — dozens of police and fire positions will go unfilled.

The parks department removed trash cans last week, replacing them with signs urging users to pack out their own litter.

Neighbors are encouraged to bring their own lawn mowers to local green spaces, because parks workers will mow them only once every two weeks. If that.

Water cutbacks mean most parks will be dead, brown turf by July; the flower and fertilizer budget is zero…

There is no hope

Police in the US state of New Jersey have ordered a family to cover up their snow sculpture of the famous nude Venus de Milo after a neighbour complained.

Eliza Gonzalez sculpted the snow-woman with her son and daughter on her front lawn in Rahway following a snowstorm.

Many people praised their creation, but a police officer told them a neighbour had found it too risque, she said…

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/8551528.stm